Chan Wah Choo Marilyn and Stanley Koh Yeng Yang

The Old 'n' The New

Chan Wah Choo Marilyn:

When I was told I was to be one of the authors of Live a Legacy, I started to think of the many people that I have come into contact with over the last half-century; I thought of close friends and family; and it finally dawned on me that I am living a legacy of my Mom. Although I have a love-hate relationship with my mother throughout my years of growing up, ironically, it is Mom whom I follow after the most.

I come from a true-blue, pure culture, typical Peranakan family of eight children — three boys and five girls. I am the youngest child. My family migrated to Singapore from Malacca 66 years ago. I was the only child born in Singapore.

My love-hate relationship with Mom started since young up until her death, more than 20 years ago. I have always been told that "[I am] my mother's daughter", a splitting image of her in many ways. I would never have admitted to it since I was young right up till now, with the sudden realization dawning upon me as I write this life legacy.

Mom was a person who was full of life and the life of any party. She was an Iron Lady and loved interacting with people. She managed to find time to do a lot of community work although she was working full time as a cashier in a Dutch multinational company to help with the family finances back in the 70s when life was tougher.

After she retired, she committed full time to the community and church work. Her passion was cooking and in her later years she was known for her cooking, particularly in Peranakan food and desserts. She was also invited to cook for many corporate functions, and later when Lion City Hotel wanted to launch their Nonya High Tea Buffet, she helped to prepare for the launch, such as teaching the chefs and supervising the food menu and arrangements. She was so famous for her Laksa that Lion City Hotel named her Laksa as "Mdm Chan's Laksa" on their menu.

Today, I am also an active person who cannot sit idle at home, and I do community work just like Mom. In so many ways, I am also known to my community and church friends for my Laksa. I am known for my Dry Laksa, although I will also prepare mine with gravy, especially for my Advisor and my friends who prefer it with gravy. 

Just like Mom, we practice the Gotong Royong style of community and family gatherings even now; the whole family comes together during Chinese New Year to make all the cookies like pineapple tarts, with each of us assigned a specific duty to prepare the pastry or fillings, chit-chatting the time away.

Mom had always believed in tradition and I am so much like her in this way as well, believing and practicing some of the traditions. For example, my family still practices Sojar, where we pay respect to the elders on the first day of Chinese New Year. I have passed on this tradition to my kids, and I hope that they will also pass this on to their children one day.

Stanley Koh Yeng Yang:

Reading Marilyn's story, and how she led a life so parallel to her mother's, I couldn't help but think how contrasting my own life is to my parents'. While the generation before us grew up in an era without technology, my generation grew up during a sprint technological advancement; our childhood was filled with TVs, PSPs, and phones, shaping my generation to be what it is now, for the better or worse.

My parents came from Malaysia and grew up in Kampungs where living conditions were considerably much poorer than what we have now. Life was not easy for them as they both have huge families, and my grandparents had to work very hard to raise their children.

As for me, I grew up in Singapore where my parents met and got married. The struggles we faced in our lives were very different as I never had to worry about starving and whether we will have any food on the table that day. Yet, we all know that everyone has their own struggles, and it would be unfair to dismiss the problems that youths face now. While the older generations faced more basic problems.

As many would know, the struggles we face in this day and age are more nuanced as compared to the previous generations, with the issues we face pushing our mental capacity to the limits. As all youths living in Singapore will agree, the pressure to do well and keep up with my classmates was no easy task and the stress build up from school was not easy to deal with.

In the past, due to the amount of tuition I had in my primary school days, my grades were towards the better side and I had high hopes of scoring well for PSLE. Until it came crashing all the way down. Unexpectedly, I scored much lower than expected in my PSLE and was very disappointed in myself and my results. Thinking back, if this had not happened I would not have met the friends I have today and never have opportunities to experience what I've experienced in the past 4 years. Now thinking about it, I have no regrets about my PSLE results as it gave me the chance to become the person I am today.

Fast Forward to my secondary school years, I've built close bonds with my friends in Maris Stella High School and have made many close friends which I will not hesitate to call brothers. School was completely different from what I once knew school as with the curriculum becoming much more challenging and much more extracurricular activities we would spend hours on. As a student I was not a great one, always sleeping in my classes and not paying attention to what the teachers have to teach us. School always just seemed to be meaningless when it came to learning. (In hindsight, as a secondary 4 student writing this, listening and paying attention in classes was a key part of our education as now catching up to my friends and all the content I've missed and was not easy.)

What kept me going in school has always been my close friends that I've formed, be it through my CCA (Taekwondo) or other common interests we have. These experiences, now that I've reached the end of my secondary school journey, feels priceless and the memories I've made will always be a part of who I am.

In this day and age I'm sure everyone has their own struggles and hardships, reading Marilyn's story made me better understand the differences between the two generations and made me want to strive to better communicate with the generations before us. I hope that anyone reading this will too have a better understanding of our two generations. And have a better unity through the generations and in the future, I hope that we will all get along better.