Amrish Aggarwal and Avishi Gurnani

Amrish Aggarwal: 

Dearest granddaughter,

How are you doing? I hope you are well. Did you know, I was the fourth-last child in a family with twelve people and it was often that I felt I would have been happier if I had more space in the house for myself, and more food that I liked. As we were growing up, I realised the value of having a brother who stood up for me in front of the school bully, a sister who made food for us when my parents had to visit a bereaved relative. That was why I volunteered to take my younger brother for his admission to college in a city far away - the sense that I give and I take. Now I am 69 years old, and in the last one year I have lost three of my siblings, one to cancer and two to the disease that is wreaking havoc in our world today - COVID-19. I only mildly recall the house or the food but what I do remember clearly are the memories of us as a family, of the strong bonds and of the reassuring protection we felt when we were together.

Yours with love, Nanu

It is important in our lives to cherish the 'who' and overlook the 'what'.

Dear Avishi,

I remember it was 1984 when the Prime Minister of India, Mrs. Indira Gandhi was shot dead. The wave of sorrow spread not only in India but also in many part of the world. There was a flood of anger against one particular community, to which the killers belonged. There was a curfew and lots of incidents that should not have happened. This put many lives in danger. But there was another thing that happened - there were people who were helping others. Many understood that because of a few people's actions the whole community cannot be blamed. Families were provided with food and shelter by helping hands. I had a friend and neighbour of that community who was at risk of being tortured by the mob. We asked their family to move into our house and lock their house, as if they were living there. They were with us till the situation was under control and they could move back. The only thing I wanted to do was to help my friend. We are still best friends even though we may not talk to each other for months. No religion or race accepts violence and friendship is a commitment to live in peace and harmony. It's not the race or religion but relationships that make us complete.

From your beloved Nanu.

Dear Avishi,

My memories are coming back to me. This memory, of… thirty-ish years ago, has been awoken in my mind. I was in the principal's office for the admission of my daughters. I was scared because it was a renowned convent school and not easy to get into. The principal suddenly smiled and said ‘I recognise you’. I thought she was mistaken; I had not met her before. She said she recognized me from a few weeks back when I had helped with the school's audio-visual system at a concert hall which had broken down in the midst of their annual day concert. I recalled then that I was attending a conference in the adjacent auditorium and when I had stepped out in the break realised they needed help. My daughters graduated from the school with a very good academic journey.

Regards,
Your Nanu

If you get the opportunity, don't hesitate to lend a helping hand, to be kind.

Dear Avishi,

A few years back, I realised I was losing my hearing. This was probably because of the exposure to heavy machine noise in my job when I was young. I was scared and I was not ready to accept this fact. I came across a ten-day mindfulness course, where the participants had to remain silent for the whole duration and not communicate with each other in any way. I went to the course and at the end of day one I felt alone and lost. Not talking to anyone, not hearing anything was difficult. And then I made a resolution to give it my best shot to complete the ten-days. The first thing that I did when I got back from the ten-day course was to accept that I am losing my hearing and get a hearing aid. I now am less self-conscious, more appreciative of my other senses - the colours and the movements around me, the taste of water that tingles my tongue and quenches my parched throat and the touch of the wind blowing across my face or the raindrop on my hand.

From your Nanu to my beloved Beti

Almost all the time, we have too much to do and the goals seem so high. One step at a time with resolve and grit is the key in every such situation.

Dearest granddaughter,

More of my memories are coming back. I remember much now… As a teenager, once while playing cricket I hit the ball so hard that it broke someone's glass window. We ran away not wanting to face the consequences. I was a naughty child. A few weeks later, I was tempted by the mangoes growing on the tree in a yard and my friend and I climbed through the fence wall up the tree and plucked some very ripe juicy mangoes. Just then, the owner of the house came out and was red with fury. There was nowhere to escape, and I thought it was better to admit this time since we were caught. The man surprisingly did not scold us but asked if we could pluck all the mangoes for him, we could keep some. 

I was a below average student, but after my father's sudden death I decided to focus and study hard. My marks in school went from a 'fail' to 'high' in one term. The teacher was suspicious that I had cheated and took me to the principal. The 'new' principal turned out to be the man who had caught me stealing the mangoes, I was doomed. But instead, he smiled and said that he trusted that I would not lie and requested the teacher to ask me a few questions then and there. I knew the answers because I had prepared and that day, I had accidentally stumbled upon a lesson that would stay with me for life.

From your Nanu.

However hard it may seem at the time, being honest and truthful pays in the end.

Avishi Gurnani: 

Beloved Nanu,

Reading your first letter to me, I reflected on myself. My brother had always been an annoying person to me. I had never thought about him annoying me in the way I do now; earlier, his behaviour was explained as trying to tire me and my parents out, now I realise it was his affection for us that made him do so. Annoying me was to let me come and play with him, it showed his love for me. My mother's nagging, oh, how often I had despised it, hated it, yet now I realise it was for my good. Without her nagging, studying for exams would be words unheard of, unsaid. The amount of trips my father delayed for my exam preparation, yet, I could only complain that we were not going. Now I thank him as my exam results are better than what I expected. Your letter has shown me the true colours of the rainbow I call my family, which I could only see in black-and-white earlier.

Yours from your loving daughter,
Avishi

Dearest Nanu,

Your letter brought tears to my eyes. I knew about this incident - the shooting of Mrs. Indira, but I never would have imagined the situation was so harsh and terrifying. Despite this, you still remained friends with your neighbour and offered to help them. Your behaviour truly sets an example for others around you. That got me thinking. I have a friend, but she moved back to India as her father was living there earlier this year. I miss her a lot and often think about the fun times we had together. Now, I have resolved to call her more often and WhatsApp her occasionally to ask her how she is doing. I may even become her pen-pal, just like we are pen-pals too!

From Avishi with love

Hi Nanu,

How are you doing? Reading your letter, my memories were aroused, of the times when I was going to a new place for a class or for school, even of the time I went to apply to go to a preschool. I was so scared of the teachers and the students there, but when I saw that one of the younger students - probably 1-2 years old, from my memory, could not open her bottle cap, I did not hesitate to help. I suppose it was just a coincidence that you happened to be next door to the auditorium where the school was holding their conference, but I still think your kindness would have mattered whether or not this instance had happened,

Yours, 
Avishi

Dear Nanu,

Your letter instilled a sense of thankfulness in me. For my near-perfect hearing, for the glasses that help me see, for the tongue that has been a gift to me by God to help me taste the wonderful cuisines and culinary delights in our world. But then, what about those who don't have these things? What about those who are living in an amputated body, their everyday struggles, their pleas and cries, all silent, not present to us who have been blessed. I wonder… I can do much, I decide. And now, I am going to take the first step I will take by donating and realising the pleas of the community around us. My eyes had not gone blind, but I could not see, until I realised, I woke up from my slumber.

Yours, 
Avishi

To my Nanu, who has stayed with me throughout my journey,

I have always been nagged at and reminded of my school value - Integrity, doing the right thing at the right time. But I always thought it meant mundane things like passing up your homework or listening to lessons obediently. It was only a few months that I was to be proven wrong. I cheated in my mock exam. These six words, they are words to gape at. No one thought I would do it. No one thought I would cheat. But I did. I was overcome with the sight of my mother looking disappointed at my mark of forty-one out of fifty for Mathematics, which was supposed to be my best subject, even more so as my mother had spent hours tirelessly explaining questions to me. I know I shouldn't have done it. But I still did. Now, I know better, and your letter has increased my feeling so I hope you'll keep writing to me...

Your granddaughter,
Avishi Gurnani